McConnell Now Answering His Phone As “Cocaine Mitch”


My new theory on why Trump urged West Virginians not to vote for Don Blankenship is that he’s jealous he’s never come up with a nickname as bad-ass as “Cocaine Mitch.” He was the master at coining memorably dopey monikers to belittle his enemies until Blankenship came along and slapped one on McConnell that makes him sound like a drug lord.

Which is funny for many reasons, but especially this one from Mary Katharine Ham: Given that Cocaine Mitch resembles a turtle, how slow and soporific would he be without the cocaine?

Anyway, if someone gives you a nickname that involves illegal drugs, you’re culturally obliged to own it. Glad to see McConnell is playing ball. And sad that Speaker Ryan is still resisting my dogged attempts to get him to start calling himself “Fentanyl Paul.” – READ MORE

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